Just a Kid
by Starwarsrebelsfan59
Summary: When Ezra is captured, a harsh reality sets in. He is just a kid, what was a 15 year old doing saving the galaxy. How will the crew deal with injuries from the accident? How will "family" dynamics change?
1. Chapter 1

**Just a Kid**

Third POV

A cold sensation rushed through Ezra's body. Lactic Acid poured into the boy's muscles, and his bones felt brittle. Unable to gather strength to open his eyes, he panicked. Where was he? Why did he feel so cold? What was happening?!

Inquisitor's POV

I have him now. I stared at the boy chained shirtless as he hung from the ceiling limp and pale. "Young Boy" I said. Fear now disturbed the force as the child recognized my presence. I couldn't help but smile from the reaction I received. I walked closer to the humanoid form, now almost lifeless much to my pleasure. I smiled as I stared at a bloody face, bruised from my hands, and scarred for life. The child's eyes flitted open only to sharply shut upon the realization of his predicament. "Open your eyes" I said calmly. Not wanting the boy to sense my frustration when he denied my presence, and ignored my command I merely laughed and sent in the probe, shortly to return with a much harsher form of punishment.

Third POV

The Ghost was quieter with a somber and frustrated air. Kanan was meditating, trying to sense his Padawan that seemed too close to death for his comfort.

Kanan's POV

 _C'mon kid, hang in there, fight, fight…_

My nervousness got the best of me. "Hera!" I ran into the cockpit to find her sitting idly with the Ghost on autopilot. "Yes?" She answered, clearly a far cry away from her normal optimistic and almost mocking replies. "We have to get Ezra back" I stated flatly, as if I needed to say the obvious. Hera gave me a quick glance and said sweetly, "I know but how?"

An idea struck me at once, if Ezra was in enough pain but alert through the force, maybe he would give enough of a signature off to signal me of his location. I at once regretted the notion I had just thought, knowing already that the poor boy was far from being strong enough to handle even more torture. How could I wish for him to endure more? I left the cabin at once, never giving a response to the mute pilot.

 _Please don't hurt him. He's just a kid. Please!_

A harsh and brutal pain signal rushed through me that sent me into an unconscious state.

Kanan's POV

It was Ezra. He was alive but in great unimaginable amounts of pain. I regretted his pain as I tried to wake myself up from the trance. Ezra was giving up. He was in too much pain. I cried out through the force.

 _Not yet, Not yet, I will come, don't die yet…_

Ezra's POV

I was overwhelmed with pain and fear. A droid driving a knife down my side as blood oozed out of me. I will overcome this I thought. Gently closing my eyes to avoid the burning pain of the dreaded droid. My heart rate began to rest, the droid had failed, I was going to be O… My thought trailed off as I screeched in pain, a light-saber scraping down my chest burning an inch deep wound along my midsection.

 _Kanan! Kanan! I can't do this. I-Its t-to mu-much!_

My cries into the force became stuttered. I was dying.

A soft but urgent voice replied

 _Not yet, Not yet, I will come, don't die yet…_

 _Please help me_

Never in my life had I been so vulnerable that I begged my master to risk his own safety for mine. On any other circumstance I would have pleaded for no one else to get hurt, but I was not ready to die. I couldn't, or Could I?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Third POV

The Ghost crew had finally found the ship Ezra was being held on. It would not be easy but they had to rescue the youngling.

Ezra's POV

Pain surged at me and I refused to acknowledge. An almost taunting voice called out to me.

 _What do you have to live for?_ It was the inquisitor's. He was inside my head.

 _Tell me boy, why suffer more when there is an easy way out. No one will save you. Not your master. Not your friends. Not yourself. You have lost so why hang on._

"I have to" I shouted at the evil figure. I knew that it would be rare if I ever saw my friends again my family for that matter. I hadn't realized how much I cared for them in that way until I was knocking at death's door.

 _Kanan! Wh-ere a-a-re y..?_

Kanan's POV

Ezra's force signature faded. Rather than a fire it was a small amber withering to extinguish. I was rushing through halls firing at will at any relative obstacle or trooper in our way. Zeb and Sabine seemed worried in their frantic motions and Zeb had lost the joy in clanking the bucket heads. They were there for one purpose. We all were, to take our crew member back.

Ezra's POV

I couldn't move. The world was darkening around me. Yet a force signature appeared. At first recognition, It was Kanan. Sabine had worked her magic on the ship, as it rocked and curved to the side about to go up in explosions and causing me to let out a small moan at the tilt of my world. The Inquisitor who already thought I was dead was now evacuating the ship as he wished to watch our death's from space. I flitted my eyes open once more to stare into Kanan's as he un-cuffed me and begged the question if I was okay. I blacked out.

Kanan's POV

As we entered the cell, all we saw was a lifeless body hanging onto existence by a thread. Light-saber wounds and droid injuries covered the boy's body. I ran to him, staring into muffled grey blue eyes that had lost the will to live. I cradled the child in my arms and sprinted for the Ghost where Hera waited anxiously, before the star-destroyer would have a chance to blow up.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Third POV

The members of the crew were staring at a crumpled form on the medical table. Ezra was barely recognizable as his hair had turned crimson and his body was malformed. Kanan and Hera had ordered the other members of the crew out of the area, knowing that the child was a view they could not handle. A mask was breathing for him and his limbs lay wrapped and braced at his sides. Kanan could not believe the utter torture the boy had gone through.

"Hera" Kanan whispered.

"He'll make it" Hera assured already knowing the question through the worried tone of her partner.

Kanan still felt unsure about it, but he had to trust that Ezra would breathe again.

Day's passed with no improvement. Kanan refused to leave his Padawan's side and could only doze off when sleep no longer took no for an answer. The young child, who had already endured so much, was merely a shape occupying the table with tubes, and needles piercing his skin so they could supply him with proper nutrition. It was now a week after the rescue, and Kanan woke at once to an awake Padawan.

"Ezra" he said softly not wanting to scare the obviously frightened boy.

Ezra's POV

 _"You will die" The inquisitor said_

 _"No I will not" I replied with all my might only to be struck again by the light-saber_

 _"You are a worthless street rat, nobody wants you, and nobody will come for you" He taunted_

 _I fought tears back and screamed at the darkness "No, No, Noooooooooo"_

 _A sudden flash and all was silent, pain grabbing at me._

I awoke to a bright white room. Immediately blinded, and gasped horridly. Where was the inquisitor? I felt a gentle presence wash over me soon comforted by the recognition that I was back on the Ghost only to have fear climb through me as pain awoke with me. I could barely see anything but I felt someone familiar nearby.

"Ezra" Kanan spoke

I wanted to reply with words but instead a slight "Ow" pursed through my dried, cracked lips.

"Ezra, you're safe now" he said. Again I responded with a soft whimper rather than actual words.

Another week had passed and I still couldn't move, though my eyes were getting slightly easier to open. Kanan knew as well as I did the Jedi heal faster than other's but this caused him to worry about the extent of my abuse as it seemed like time inched by. Each night I relived that dreadful crisis, not being able to escape my own mind. I flinched each night, not being able to move any more than that, and could feel my master attempting to send calming waves through the force to me. Eventually I opened my eyes all the way to see the entire crew observing my every blink. I could barely make out a tear stained smile but it was enough of one to let them know I was okay. Kanan leaned over me and brushed away my sweat soaked hair only for me to land my eyes directly on the light-saber around his belt. I screeched and attempted to get away from the man. I panicked as I knew I couldn't move and the world seemed to turn upside down. I could hear Kanan's voice "It's okay" "The light-saber's gone" "Just breathe Kid."

I merely whimpered and felt his callused hand rub my hand gently.

Kanan's POV

I felt terror spread through the boy right before I realized what a terrible mistake I had made. My light-saber dangling off my belt was in Ezra's view and the boy's screech pierced the air. All I could do was quickly detach all of my weapons and place them out of sight for the Kid. I watched his frightened eyes turn childlike-something I had yet to witness- and was forced to recognize his true age. After treating Specter six like a self sufficient member for so long, I sometimes forgot that he was only 15, and didn't ever have a childhood. I rubbed his hand softly as the now vulnerable student of mine drifted warily off to sleep.

"Hera, we need to talk."

Hera nodded and whispered "I know love, he's too young."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Kanan's POV

"Hera, What were we thinking?!" I felt frustration rise up in me as we walked out on to the plains of Lothal.

"What's wrong?" Her voice still calm though slightly annoyed.

"He, Ezra Bridger, My Padawan is a 15 year old boy that we throw into battle and wait several weeks to rescue just for our convenience!" I could no longer hold back my anger as I vented on the twi'lek before me.

"Calm down" Her voice clear and precise as I was forced to obey the command.

"What is this about?" She asked sternly, clearly tired of trying to guess my emotions.

I paused before I explained "Hera, I was just a little boy when I trained at the temple, it was normal for the Jedi order to recruit young-lings at a very small age. But when I think of all that went wrong with the order, the bad that accompanied the good, I know that recruiting small children to be trained in war is wrong." I paused again and then continued "Ezra is just a kid, he's smart, careful, and a complete genius in street smarts, but he is just a kid. So is Sabine" I continued. "We fight everyday with them, but it's gone too far."

"Love, I know they're young but we protect them as much as we can…"

I interrupted "I can't lose another person I love!"

The words escaped my mouth before I even knew what I said.

Hera smiled at me "I love him too."

"Where do we go from here?" I asked exasperated.

"We help him" Hera Continued "We get him recovered, we help through his nightmares and we treat him like family, we treat everyone like family."

Looking at my hesitant face she said "Even chopper, mister"

I couldn't help but grown. The droid was always pestering me or messing something up, but the comic relief was enough to force a smile on my face. Hera chuckled and walked away.

Ezra's POV

My nightmares continued to haunt me but despite my lack of sleep I continued to recover, albeit slowly. On the third week of my recovery I could gently sit up with Kanan's help, this time he had removed all weapons from my sight. Pressing my weight against him, he would lift up my back and cradle my head into his shoulder so I would not fall down. The touch felt comfortable and familiar though I still attempted to resist. It was Kanan after all, why was he being so comforting? Kanan could sense my comfortable yet confused attitude and gently quizzed me on my well-being.

"You good Kid?" He asked, trying to smile.

"I'm fine" I laughed trying to ease the tension in the room. "If it weren't for the smell Zeb left behind that is."

Kanan saw through me and gently rubbed my back, making sure not to lose his supportive grip.

"Ezra, I need you to be honest with me."

"Whatever you say _Master"_ I probed wanting to show the Jedi that I was back to my normal self.

"Ezra, please tell me how you feel." Kanan said now attempting to not get annoyed.

Kanan would not let it go so I had no choice.

"The truth is that I don't know. I feel scared, but also safe." I paused. "I'm in a lot of pain but I will be fine." I grimaced at my own words, I'll be fine I repeated to myself.

At this statement Kanan lifted my head and gently placed it back on the pillow since I had little to no strength. I saw an emotion flash through his eyes, was it concern? Was it fatherly care? I stuttered in my thoughts, now very confused on the situation but somehow appreciative of this uncovered side to my master, as Kanan interrupted my thoughts.

"Get some rest Padawan"

Another week went by. I was now able to move a bit on my own which earned me outside privileges. I had developed a fever throughout the recovery process but was comforted by cool air blowing through my hair. My head hurt and I felt like I was burning but I knew that it meant my body was fighting off infection and that I just needed to cooperate with it. I stared out at the plains and forced my mind to meditate on anything but the pain. Kanan laughed in shock as he came up behind me.

"What's so funny?" I asked looking around for a prank Zeb had pulled.

Kanan smirked "I never thought I'd see the day that you voluntarily sat still, let alone mediate."

I avoided eye contact with him so he couldn't tell that I was sick. I had no interest in going back to the medical bay with those awful lights and distilled bleach smell.

Kanan sat beside me and said "Kid your either a Master Jedi or you're hiding something."

I, being stubborn as all, simply smiled with my eyes still closed and said, "Maybe I should be teaching you, _Padawan"_ I emphasized the last word which earned me a swift pop upside the head. On any circumstance I would have retorted and given it back, but my head spun and the world grew blurry. Despite my best attempt to control myself I was out and hit something soft as everything went black.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

I woke up back in the medical bay as bleach and filtered air made its way into my sinuses. There was nothing I would have rather done than simply curled up and ignored life but fear crawled through me as I didn't have the strength to face another nightmare. Unfortunately the universe deemed otherwise and I was tugged into a deep slumber.

 _"You will die" The inquisitor said_

 _"No I will not!" I replied with all my might only to be struck again by the light-saber._

 _"You are a worthless street rat, nobody wants you, and nobody will come for you" He taunted_

 _I fought tears back and screamed at the darkness "No, No, Noooooooooo"_

 _I heard laughter everywhere…_

 _"Stupid Loth-rat, kid actually thought we cared" Zeb laughed._

 _"Right, and as if he ever belonged with us, I pity him" Sabine smirked._

 _I fought back tears as I watched my friends abandon me. Come on Hera, Kanan please not you too._

 _"I'm with Sabine, kids useless, he's too young and he doesn't know how to handle pain" Hera mocked._

 _Master please don't send me away….._

 _"We need to dump him" Kanan agreed with an emotionless face._

I felt my body being pressed as I jolted upwards only to collide with Kanan's forehead. I stared into his eyes. It was just a dream, it was just a dream, I felt tears rising up in my face but refused to be looked at like some helpless, useless child.

"Ezra, why didn't you tell me you were sick?!" Kanan practically screamed with a hint of guilt in his voice from our previous interaction.

"I feel fine" I snapped. "You just caught me off guard, it won't happen again" I mustered.

I bolted out of the room still swaying a bit on my feet not allowing Kanan to press questions further than that. I had to get away from him, from all of them, I had to hide this, whatever it is, so they wouldn't leave me.

Kanan's POV

I watched as Ezra had a fit in his sleep, and then jolted up to bang heads with me. I still felt awful for causing him to pass out but I had to get some answers. I tried asking him questions but he didn't stick around long enough to get to the truth. He bolted out of the room, still obviously sick, and ran down the ramp out onto the plains. I chased after him, and yelled.

"Kid, where do you think you're going?"

"I'm just going for a run", Ezra said flatly. "Got to keep up my training right!"

I stood in shock as the energetic kid disappeared from my sight. Was there something going on with him or was he just fully recovered?

Ezra's POV

I ran out of sight before falling to my knees. My head hurt and I vomited the remaining contents of my stomach into the grass. I decided to just lay there for a while. I didn't want to run away but I also didn't want to hang out at the Ghost. Most importantly I did not want to sleep.

I stared up at the sky and watched ships pass over me. Imagining the days where I used to stare out of my tower at the glistening white buildings before the Empire ruined them. The thought made me sick as I started to breathe heavily and forced myself to calm down. The Empire had taken so much from me, and now it was the Empire's fault that my crew thought I was worthless.

What could I do to prove myself to the crew I thought? Get back in the game so to speak. I remembered a grocery list Hera had mumbled about. Perfect, I thought, I'll prove that I can be helpful.

I casually walked down the streets of the market, not wanting to draw attention to myself, but every now and then had to stop in an alleyway to catch my breath. Nobody ever noticed me so I was able to sneak around the storm troopers fairly easily. As I finished off the supply list I felt nauseated and ducked behind a fruit stand to sit and rest. Unlucky for me, I was not the only person behind the stand.

I stared at a man that I did not recognize. Tension grew between us before he spoke.

"Well, isn't it my lucky day." He hissed.

I felt a lump in my throat as I got up to run away. I was too late. Rough, hard, hands grabbed at my waist and before I knew it I was on the ground being beaten. Not again I thought. How am I going to get out of this without the crew?

As a fist punched me in my gut I felt a burning sensation. My old wounds had reopened, the light-saber wound now bleeding in full force as the last of the stitches tore. I felt what little hope I had sink. I had to get away. As emotions flooded me, I felt the force within me grow stronger and wilder. Kanan had taught me not to use my emotions but I could no longer resist the opportunity before me. As the man raised his fist to throw another jab at my head I threw out my hand and watched in bewilderment as he flew into a nearby wall. I grabbed the supplies at my side and ran for my tower.

My whole body ached and my shirt was turning red as I continued to bleed out. I fought my way upstairs and felt relief wash over me when I noticed an extra medical kit in the corner. Thank the force I had enough street smarts to know how to stitch myself up.

I flipped open the cap of the peroxide and clenched my teeth in pain as the liquid poured into my wound and left behind a white foam bubbling on my chest. I continued the process of healing by threading several stitches into place covered by a bacta patch. Once sure that the wound would not reopen, I let out a small sigh of relief, snatched an old shirt from beneath my makeshift bed, and carefully made my way back to the Ghost.

As I approached the ramp, head still spinning, supplies in hand, all I could think to myself was _Hide it, Don't let them see, Hide all emotions._


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Ezra's POV

My headache was still in full force. A good pounding from a lizard looking man had certainly taken its effect on me.

Kanan was waiting on the ramp, arms folded, and a stern yet almost guilty look on his face.

Kanan's POV

While Ezra was out on a run, I began to feel worried that maybe he had overheard me about the incident. I had talked to Hera about it, and she insisted that both Ezra and I tell each other what's wrong. After contemplating the best way to approach the obviously touchy subject, I was relieved to see Ezra with supplies in hand, and a small grin on his face as walked up the ramp of the Ghost. I was beginning to realize just how worried I got over the young boy and how fond of him I had become. He was like a son to me and I wanted him to know that I cared.

"Ezra, Thanks for the supplies" I smirked.

"Yeah- uh- no problem" He mustered.

"Hey-a Kid, we need to talk about some stuff, okay?" I did the best I could to hide the worry of my voice but the sentence came out a bit rough.

"OkayKanan" His voice slurred, "Justletmesleepsome" he answered again slurring his words together.

I faced the boy who was trying his best to cover something up. I couldn't quite figure out what was wrong until I noticed a crimson splotch appearing on his shirt and the boy started wheezing as he fought for air the second time that day.

"Ezra" I grabbed hold of him but he resisted trying to muster out an okay signal but instead collapsed on the floor still resisting help.

"I'm done playing games kid, let me help you." I said as my expression turned stern.

Ezra obviously noted the difference and stopped in his tracks as he leaned in to my arms. I immediately grabbed him up into a heap in my arms as I notified Hera and made pace towards the medical bay. Somehow despite bleeding everywhere, the kid had managed not to pass out.

Hera was quick to redress the wound and ushered me out of the room so that my anger at the kid, who had ignorantly tried to hide everything, would not be seen.

Ezra's POV

I laid in silence as I watched Hera quickly stitch my wound in a much cleaner fashion and usher Kanan out of the room. Part of me was curious if he would stay but I guess I didn't mean that much to him.

"Don't you ever pull something like that again!" Hera stated interrupting my thoughts.

I stuttered " I'm sorry"

Hera looked at me sympathetically before saying "I'll send Kanan in, rest for now"

A lump rose to my throat, why did Kanan want to see me?

"Hey Kid, how you feeling?" Kanan said with a hint of sympathy

"I'll be fine, don't worry."

"And mentally?" He asked still knowing that it had only been a month since my rescue and looking rather displeased with my last answer.

"Fine as well" I said. I contemplated the statement that had just escaped my mouth and then decided it was worth a try to believe it. Kanan couldn't begin to understand how many times I was hit or screamed at as a child from various sources and then the Inquisitor tormented me with the memories forcing them to the front of my thoughts and altering them so that it would cause even more mental anguish. There was a part of me that wanted to tell my master but that would mean revealing a lot more to him than I had originally planned. Kanan deserved to know the truth but so did I. There was something my master wasn't telling me. There was a reason he was being so nice. I glanced up at him, only to have him meet my eyes in a sorrowful way. There was fear in his eyes.

"Kanan, what's wrong?" I tried to ask but my voice still cracked lightly.

"Nothing, my Padawan, just thinking is all…" He said in a soothing manner.

I was about to rebuke his claim but sleep tugged at me and my body could no longer hold itself. I flopped to the bed and succumbed to the darkness.

Third POV

Kanan thought about the question that Ezra had asked him and knew that the Padawan would eventually find out the truth. Since the two had bonded much tighter through the force than either one was aware of, Kanan knew that both he and Ezra would be unable to keep secrets from each other that emitted such strong feelings. Kanan walked to the cockpit to find Hera. She was more relaxed now that Ezra was healing faster, but there was still a glint of worry in her soft green eyes. Kanan sat in the co-pilots chair and waited for a lecture to come. Hera spoke softly to her partner.

"Love, you need to tell me and Ezra why you're upset."

Kanan stared down at his seat and whispered "I wished for the Kid to endure more pain…. I thought- I thought- maybe I could find him if he emitted such a strong signature…. It's my fault."

"Kanan, listen very closely to me. You did as you were trained to do. You thought of every solution you could have, and it was not you who made the inquisitor torture him, you only wanted to save him. Love, it is in no way your fault." Hera soothed.

Kanan felt overcome by guilt but knew that Hera had a point. He still wished that Ezra could've emitted a force signature of hope rather than despair though.

Kanan smiled at his partner and walked back to the medical bay. There he found Sabine gently stroking her brotherly friend's hair. He smiled at the comfort it appeared to be giving his Padawan but knew that she needed to leave to tell Ezra the truth. He smiled at her as he nodded at the doorway. She acknowledged and left quietly.

"Ezra" Kanan spoke softly and gently woke up the sleeping child.

"Yeah?" he replied.

"We um.." There was a pause and Ezra could sense the truth. "We need to talk" Kanan mustered.

"Okay..." Ezra replied with a sense of compassion in his voice.

Kanan wondered how the young boy could almost tell what he was thinking but he continued with his plea for forgiveness.

"I'm sorry" Kanan spoke flatly trying to avoid eye contact with the innocent cobalt blue eyes that were still returning to their usual electric appearance.

Without needing explanation, Ezra replied "It wasn't your fault."

Kanan spoke again slightly more frustrated in tone this time… "You don't understand"

Ezra this time angry yet calm said "Master, you wished for me to feel pain, but you didn't cause it"

Kanan was now very confused, he knew their bond had grown but to the extent of knowing the details of each other's thoughts he could not entirely grasp. His master and he had never shared that connection.

"I'm so sorry" was all Kanan could say in return. He stood up to leave the bay looking back at the boy he loved as a son.

Ezra's POV

I thought about calling out to him, asking him to stay but there was something inside of me that felt betrayal, sure Kanan hadn't tortured me but he still thought it, he still wanted no needed to see me injured. I realized that the action was to save my life and I was left to my thoughts as Kanan exited the room.


	7. Chapter 7

Hi all,

As I am an athlete and have summer training for college athletics all during the summer and of course throughout the entire school year, the likelihood of updating my story within the next 5 years is very slim. I therefore am willing to let anybody continue it on if they so wish. I would greatly like to see it be about the space family dynamics etc. , while also exploring Ezra's past. If you do want to continue the story let me know, all that I request is that it stays the same rating with no slash, and or other inappropriate material.

Thank you,

starwarsrebelsfan59


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